Is it just me?

I can honestly say that the contact is the worst part of a tour. We wait days, weeks and sometimes even months just for that one phone call. When will it be? We never know, I have taken to having my mobile on me constantly whilst I am out and if I'm home I will have the house phone, mobile and my laptop with me at all times.
There is absolutely nothing worse than knowing that there is a chance they could call and missing it. I leave the house these days and I seem to know just when my house phone is ringing and who it will be.
I wake up every morning in the hope that there is a message from him just to say hi, I'm okay, love you. The feeling of your heart sinking when you see the words "no new emails" or see that there are no new notifications for facebook. There are no words to describe that feeling.
Wouldn't it be better if we could just pick up the phone and call them whenever we wanted? I guess that we could only ever live in hope of that becoming an option for us.
There are times where the contact is only short lived and then we don't hear again for periods of time that just seem to become longer and longer between every little bit of contact.
I cannot wait for the day that I can actually have a phone call from my man without the signal being so god damn crap and not being able to hear what he says properly.
I seem to be okay with the lack of contact, it hasn't really hit me as much as I thought it would do but after I hang up from every phone call deep down I wish he would just pick up the phone and call again if only to say the words "I love you".
I hear people going on about how much contact they get and that they hear from their men at least 3 or 4 times a day and I suddenly feel sad and jealous at the fact that they have all that contact each and every day and I have to wait days or even weeks between mine. They say that they have had enough and that they can't cope with the tour any more, do they not see that they have the easier tour and that they are just being naive? I wish that I could have all of that contact and I know I certainly would not be complaining that I couldn't cope with a tour. I guess we all deal with it in different ways. I find myself sitting and questioning their strength more often than not. Do they really have to have strength if all they do is sit in day in and day out waiting for all those phone calls? To me I would just say that it's like them being away on exercise or something, not in the middle of a war zone.
How much of this can you take before you fall to pieces? My breaking point becomes lower and lower each time we speak. I seem to have hit rock bottom and can't budge myself from it. Is it bad to want him home now? To have this tour over with? We are 9 nearly 10 weeks in and as much as it feels like it has flown by I find myself sitting and thinking is that all? Are we really only that far in? Looking back on it the time seems to have dragged.
It isn't much longer now until we have him home for r&r but all I can think about is how do I get through these next few weeks knowing its so close yet still feels so far away. I want to fall completely to pieces and for him to pick me up and tell me that we are done with this tour and that everything is okay. I can't bare to have him away any longer. I found this by far the easiest tour so far but it doesn't seem that way any more, each day I wake up it seems to be harder than the last.
Is it really always going to be like this.......?